Bell’s Blog

I will try again tomorrow

Winter is Coming

It’s the truth! The days are getting shorter, the air has a sharp chill in it always. Days are cool and nights are cold. As our big move draws ever closer, The weather isn’t exactly helping me feel motivated to pack and sort my things. I really need to get my arse into gear. With only 2 weeks left, I’m running out of time!

And yet…. here I am writing a short blog post! Procrastinating much? *runs away*


Leaving Switzerland

How long has it been since my last post? Too long. A lot has happened since. As a family we went home for Chinese New Year in February, and there we spoke to many friends and family members who either never left or have returned to live and work from overseas. After much discussion we have decided it is time to move home. Malaysia. Kuching. My mother in law has a house there, and we can move in to live there since she currently lives in New Zealand. It’s been a tough decision to make. We are actually quite comfortable here in Switzerland. Abigail was also born here. Medical care has been top notch. Child friendly, so many facilities for families. The outdoors, mountains, lakes, rivers all practically at our doorstep. Europe just a skip and a hop away. But there have been residency issues, and it’s time we left. I like it here a lot but we will always be foreigners in a foreign land. We don’t share their customs, we don’t speak the language, we look different and think different. No matter how we integrate, we will never be a part of their society.

As such, it’s time to pack up our things. Time to say goodbye. Time to sell our furniture and donate our clothes. We won’t be needing as many winter clothes as we did before. Oh sure we will keep a few, for traveling, for visiting family in New Zealand and Canada, but nowhere near as much as we would need if we lived here. Giving away Abigail’s baby clothes has been the toughest for me to deal with. It makes sense for most people to hang on to baby’s clothes in anticipation of a 2nd child. But to haul it all back with no assurance the 2nd child will be a girl is not worth it. It’s so hard to put everything away into boxes, into bags, even though I’m donating it, I feel as if I’m throwing away all these precious memories of my baby girl growing up. Shoes, socks, booties, onesies, dresses and shirts, winter jackets, wooly hats… all have to go. I’ll be keeping a couple of items just as keepsakes… but the rest has to go. It’s absolutely heartbreaking.

But we are starting a new life. I will be giving away my beloved aquarium and shrimps in the weekend. Abigail’s baby cot and high chair will be sold off in the next few weeks. Our date has been set. September 30. shelves, cupboards, sofa, bed TV, it all has to go. Little by little it is as if we are erasing our last 8 years here. 8 years! Has it really been that long? Incredible. We packed up our lives once before and left New Zealand to come to Switzerland. And although I don’t remember much of it, it had already happened once too, much earlier in my life when my family moved to New Zealand and I was only 9. That was over 20 years ago now. Life is fickle like that. And now it has come full circle and we are moving back to Malaysia as a new family. We will start fresh, and Abigail will go to school there. I will find time for another child when we settle down. Our family will grow.

Now is a time for new beginnings.

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Sick Baby

Is it this about to turn into a mama blog? Maybe… maybe not. Abigail is sick. has had a very high fever of 39.4 degrees since yesterday. Of course medicines like baby ibuprofen syrup help lower the temperature but only for a few hours and then it begins all over again. I called her doctor yesterday evening who suggested lots of fluids and a different med to be used alternately with her syrup to help fever… and then if it didn’t get better I would go see her in the morning. Problem is that this morning she was OK… feeling better, her fever subsided and while she was active and uncomplaining, I could tell she still wasn’t well. She didn’t want to eat. She was vomiting up whatever she DID eat. Yesterday she was guzzling water like she just spent a week in the desert… but today she barely wanted to sip any. Now her fever is back same as last night except she has extra symptoms like vomiting and diarrhoea… I’ve called her doctor but she’s closed on tuesday afternoons. I called the emergency line, and find that the doctor on duty tonight is about a half hour drive away. Have recalled hubby to come home from work and we will drive the mean time i just have to hang on and cuddle my already overheating baby….

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I’ve been wondering and wondering… Should I begin blogging again? Is it worth it? Do I have the time and energy to do this? It’s hard to say. I come by and type something and delete it before it reaches a couple of paragraphs long because it’s just so boring. I rarely cook anything interesting, and my life really only revolves around 4 things…. Sleep, Eat, Baby, Work. What? No one knew I had a baby because they haven’t been reading my blog and I haven’t been updating? Of course everyone knows! Everyone’s on facebook right? I’ve been posting all sorts of cute and adorable pics, some pretty mean videos that Abbie will surely hate me for, and status updates waffling on about how cranky and sleep deprived I am. Truth is, Abbie is now almost a year old, which means I’ve not blogged for over 1.5 years! WHOAAA!!! So even as I type this I still wonder if it’s worth duplicating all my facebook posts and blogging about how cranky and sleep deprived I am here too?

And now here comes another truth… I actually sleep pretty well. Have been for months. Sure we have our odd nasty howling nights… but all in all… I reckon life’s pretty sweet albeit monotonous right now. I work Wednesday-Saturday at my old job, Kwang stays home with Abbie if I’m working on Wednesday or Saturday, and Abbie goes to a daycare on Thursday and Friday. Abbie and I have quality time messing up the apartment on Mondays and Tuesdays and Sundays are mostly spent as a family though not always. SHe has now mastered crawling and standing, and wants to walk… that or she clings to my leg while I try to cook lunch or dinner, which is why I rarely cook anything new or interesting anymore… and even then they’re often unsuccessful… I need to find a solution to this.

I now have a sort of early New Year’s resolution. To join the gym, to eat healthier and lose some weight, save some money, complain less about how tired I always feel. I’ll add one more thing to that… try to blog again. We’ll see how that pans out

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Anyone out there still doesn’t know?

I know that not a lot of people frequent my blog anymore. I don’t blame them though, I’ve been totally slack at updating and writing. But I just thought I should make some announcements or confirmations. In case anyone still doesn’t know… I’m Having a Baby. Yes I’m pregnant… due in early December… meaning I’m now officially halfway through the ordeal. I’ve been feeling mostly fine throughout. No unpleasantness. No sickness. Just general tiredness mostly, after all, creation of life is an exhausting task to undertake! Of course now at 20+ weeks I’m beginning to round out and feel somewhat more like a hippo than a human… and I guess it’s only a matter of time before I feel like a beached whale… Not looking forward to that part! Haha!

Just got back from my monthly doctor’s check up today and it seems like I’m having a girl, though the baby was moving around a lot so we only got quick glimpses. We can take another look next month and see if there are any surprise changes. But in the mean time… I’ll assume it’s a girl 🙂 Kwang’s pretty proud of himself, as he’s been saying all week that he thinks we’re having a girl. Though he couldn’t really give me an answer as to why he thought that. He had some theory about me not being grumpy and angry all the time like the horror stories he’d been hearing.

Work has been going on mostly as normal. I’m no longer allowed to carry anything remotely heavy but I’m ok with that. I plan to keep working for as long as is sensible for me to be there. My boss said his wife worked until a week before her due date. I might not last as long as that but I will certainly try. In the mean time, life goes on and there are things that need doing and planning. I will try to keep updated here…

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